The following was delivered at the wedding of Michael Jones and Kaitlyn Jack.
What we are witnessing here today is becoming more and more counter-cultural in Western Civilization. The foundations of Western Civilization have been cracking and crumbling for some time now. As men’s abdication of their responsibilities became increasingly evident in the eighteenth and nineteenth centuries, precipitating the rise of Feminism, the seeds were sown for the destruction of marriage and, with it, a stable civilization.
First, women wanted to be equal with men, and they believed that the greatest codification of that would be the right to vote, which is now enshrined in the Nineteenth Amendment to the US Constitution. But the seeds of discontent with biblical structures continued to grow. In the second wave of Feminism, women declared their independence from men. Gloria Steinem proudly declared that a woman needs a man like a fish needs a bicycle.
Men stood by and watched while the serpent continued to convince the woman that God’s structures were oppressive. Consequently, the seeds continued to grow, and in the third wave of Feminism women essentially declared, “We are men.” There are no differences between biological men and women. Our outward displays may be different in some respects, but we are the same. This led to where we are today with the declaration that there is no such thing as men and women; gender is fluid; it’s all in what you feel.
All along the way, men watched and gave tacit approval. Why not? Feminism fed men’s slothfulness.
With the rise of Feminism came the sexual revolution, and with it the availability of sexual relationships without the commitment. Whereas the prevailing culture of chastity and honor encouraged men to take up the responsibilities of a husband, now they could have all of the sexual benefits without the responsibilities. Besides that, with seventy percent of divorces being initiated by women who then leave the man penniless and kept from his children, many men are seeing marriage as a bad business deal.
Women are frustrated because they were told that they could have a career, marry late, and still have all they want. They are discovering that they were lied to.
Marriage has been damaged deeply in our culture. From the hook-up culture to high divorce rates to homosexuals demanding to be recognized as married, God’s institution of marriage, which is fundamental to the stability of any society, is mocked.
But here, today, Michael and Kaitlyn stand before God and witnesses to receive God’s gift of marriage. This gift is given to you, Michael and Kaitlyn, to enjoy. Because you are receiving God’s gift in the way that he prescribes it, there is a reward that comes with it. There is the freedom to enjoy one another without guilt; to know and be known by one another in a way that those who do not obey God will never experience. Enjoy God’s gift to you.
God’s gifts always come with responsibilities. You are stewards of his gift. You enjoy marriage, but marriage does not belong to you. God created marriage for a larger purpose than the personal enjoyment of the individual man and woman. Marriage is a mission. More particularly, it is a military mission.
As I alluded to earlier, we are in a war, not just over the definition of marriage, but the purpose of marriage in the world to help establish the kingdom of God in the world. God instituted marriage as one of the tools or weapons to complete the mission of bringing the world under the lordship of his Son; to see the world patterned after his heavenly abode. The structure of marriage with the man as the head, the woman in submission, and children obeying their parents is not arbitrary and merely a practical way to function. These structures reflect the deep structures with the relationship of God himself that is the pattern for all of life.
Marrying this day before God and witnesses, you are committing yourself to be warriors in this fight. You will do so, not with guns a-blazing, but by simply living out God’s structure and purpose for marriage.
Michael, as you take the lead, determining the mission of the home, part of which is cultivating Kaitlyn’s beauty as a woman, you will be taking up the responsibilities that many men in Western Civilization have neglected. Kaitlyn, as you submit to the loving headship of Michael, helping him in his God-given mission, you will be taking up the responsibilities that many women in Western Civilization have scorned. As the Lord wills and you have and rear godly children, you will be providing even more weapons for the fight. In doing all of these things, you will be faithful to the purpose for which God gave marriage.
Be bold! Be brave! Take up your responsibilities with courage and fight the good fight.
In the name of the Father, and of the Son, and the Holy Spirit.
