Children are born believing that everyone around them is there to serve them. I suppose that this would have been true even before the fall. They are entirely dependent upon everyone else, and when they make a need known, someone is there to serve them. That would have happened in a world without sin. But when you add sin to this creation reality, selfishness is the result. This sinfulness is the foolishness bound up in a child’s heart from birth (Pr 22:15).
One aspect of maturing is gaining a sense of otherness; the whole world is not all about me, but I am to be serving others. Serving others involves putting others’ genuine needs above my personal comforts. The greatest example of this is, of course, our Lord Jesus Christ. When instructing the Philippians to look not only to one’s own interests but also for the interests of others, Paul turns immediately to Christ’s self-emptying at the cross that secured our salvation (Phil 2:1-8). He follows this up later with examples of Timothy and Epaphroditus. Each gave himself in particular ways for the needs of others, following Christ’s example.
Learning how to give oneself to the point of suffering for the sake of others is a sign of maturity. When writing to the Colossians concerning the aim of his ministry to present every man mature in Christ (Col 1:28), Paul says that he rejoices in his sufferings for their sake as he “fills up what is lacking in the afflictions of Christ, for the sake of his body, the church” (Col 1:24). As a minister with a stewardship from God for the Colossians (and the rest of the Gentiles), suffering for the sake of others comes with the territory.
“Filling up what is lacking in the afflictions of Christ” has been a source of debate for a long time. According to Daniel 7, there would be suffering before the kingdom was given to the Son of Man (who is both one person and many, Jesus plus the saints). Jesus already suffered once-for-all in his own person at the cross, completing the work of reconciliation (Col 1:19-23). But his saints (among whom are the Colossians, see Col 1:2) must also suffer before the old world embodied in the Jerusalem Temple is destroyed and the kingdom comes in. Paul’s suffering is a part of filling up those afflictions in Christ’s body, the church, to inaugurate this new creation.
Filling up the afflictions of Christ is a difficult concept, but rejoicing in his sufferings for the sake of others is easier to understand, though it may be challenging to grasp. Paul shows the maturity for which he is aiming in the church. He rejoices in his suffering. He doesn’t rejoice despite his suffering. He doesn’t rejoice as he looks at his suffering in retrospect. He rejoices in his suffering. Why? Because he knows that his suffering is a part of God’s plan that makes the church what she ought to be. His suffering is purposeful. For this reason, he rejoices.
When we look at the apostle’s imprisonments, beatings, stonings, and the other pains endured for the church, we may stand in amazement and have gratitude for what Paul did but not see it as something that only some individuals go through at particularly difficult times in church history. But the underlying principle of living and suffering for the sake of others applies to all of us daily. Sometimes, the suffering is less intense (so we might not even call it “suffering” but rather inconvenience). Sometimes it is more intense. But giving ourselves for the sake of others is at the heart of maturity.
The reality that our Western culture has slipped into sinful immaturity is revealed in the fact that we don’t rejoice in our responsibility to suffer any inconvenience for the sake of others. While we all need to take time to care for ourselves so that we will have something to give to others, there is a “me-time” that pervades our culture and even the church that is sinfully immature. This me-time is characterized by consistently avoiding our responsibilities to others to do what we want. Husbands and fathers, not wanting to deal with the difficulties of wife and children, either avoid them altogether or, if they are already married with children, busy themselves with work or hobbies. Wives and mothers, frustrated with husbands and the demands of children, want to get away all the time for margaritas or trips with other me-timers while dumping their responsibilities on others. The unmarried are always tempted to be me-timers and play all the time instead of using their time to serve Christ’s kingdom. Retirement, for many, is the great “me-time” in the golden years. If we do take the time to “suffer” for the sake of others, we certainly don’t rejoice in it. We endure it to fill up the afflictions that we believe we need to keep God off our backs so that we can go and do what we want.
Seeking your own pleasure all the time, grumbling and complaining while you perfunctorily fulfill your responsibilities are signs of sinful immaturity. Being able to accept responsibility and rejoice in it, even when it is demanding, is a sign that you are maturing. This is the example Christ, Paul, and many others put before us. Rejoicing in suffering is one measure of maturity.
