Discipleship Archives - Page 16 of 16

On August 19, 2020 By Bill Smith In Counseling/Piety, Culture, Discipleship, Men, Wisdom 2

Letters To Young Men: The Man & His Mission

Dear Young Man,

In my first letter, I talked to you about the state of masculinity in our culture; what you are facing and will have to face in the future. It’s bad out there, and you face many challenges. However, as we will see as we proceed through these letters, challenges should be right up your alley. The purpose of these letters is not merely to curse the darkness, but to give you light by which to walk as men. Consequently, in this second letter, I begin focusing positively on what it means to be a man.

First and foremost, man is created a worshiper. As the image of God, man is created to reflect and participate in the family life of the Father, Son, and Holy Spirit. We are to join in the family conversation—prayer—talking to one another about needs, praising one another for good works, asking for forgiveness where we have sinned (us, not God, of course), eating with one another (the Supper), talking about the situations in our families, churches, nations, and the world, and suggesting things that might be done about it. We are to listen to our God, the one who created us, redeemed us, and defines who we are and what we are to do in this world. We are to respond in allegiance to him, loving him with all of our being and joyfully obeying what he commands. You are created, first and foremost, as a worshiper.

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On August 18, 2020 By Uri Brito In Church, Discipleship Like

The Case for Keeping Children in Worship, Part 2

Introduction

Part 1

The goal of this discussion is to foster conversation on a topic that is too neglected in evangelical churches. And speaking of evangelicals, I am one of those who proudly affirm the “evangel” and if the “icals” were a team I’d cheer them on as well. So, I am trying to speak from a place of wild familiarity.

I also don’t want to shame anyone into keeping their kids through the whole service when they haven’t thought carefully about it and are simply acting out of guilt. Guilt-based decisions have the durability of an ice cream cone left out in the Florida sun. Making decisions that are not common in various congregations (and in this case the majority) need to be done discerningly. One of my answers to people about children and schooling and other related subjects is that I love my children much more than your ideal scenario. In other words, if a Church practices something that I am not comfortable with regarding my children, my children will always take precedence over the Church’s ideals.

So, if a Church has a suggested policy (if such policies are mandated we have a whole other problem) that children go to children’s church during “adult” worship” and you decide that it is best that your children stay, and you do it peacefully without causing a scene, the leaders of the church should understand. And if they get into a habit of making ugly faces at you every Sunday and sending you dissertations about how your child is only holy if he/she goes to that children’s church down the hall, then it may be time for you to have a more serious conversation as a family about how a) to continue dealing gracefully with such an uncomfortable situation, or b) how to properly inform the leaders that what they are doing is not kosher and needs to stop, or c) begin to discuss how to graciously and honorably leave that body.

So, it should be clear that this is not an attempt at revolution or causing havoc in a local congregation. What I am trying to do is to bring to your attention a different way to view children whether in the local Baptist or Presbyterian or “insert cool name” Church.

First Argument Against Children in Church

One of the more common arguments made against keeping children in Church–from beginning to end—is: “I can’t keep my children quiet during worship, therefore I don’t see the need to keep them with me.” The argument posits that the demands of disciplining and watching over little ones during the worship service ultimately does not bear any benefits.

This is a legitimate concern. You are in Church to worship on the Lord’s Day and the last thing you want is to add additional tasks to your time. After all, weren’t you just in the process of changing a diaper, disciplining, correcting, breaking up a fight right before Church? Why bring that whole business into the house of the Lord?

The first response is that there is no place you can go where some level of authority structure is not set into place. If you walk into the local Wal-Mart with your little one (s), you are still expected to navigate difficult scenarios. In other words, you cannot escape your authority. Whether a dad or mom, your authority needs to be exercised–always preferably lovingly–at all times and in all places. The nurture and admonition of the Lord does not take a Sabbath on the Sabbath (Lord’s Day), rather it should be accentuated.

There are two things that matter to the Christian: a) the worship of the Triune God, b) and how that worship fleshes itself out during the week.The worship of God most powerfully manifested on the Lord’s Day proves to be the most sober opportunity you will have to train your little ones (we will discuss some practical steps down the line). Of course, you could let Sister Sally watch your little ones during Church, and I am certain she will be saying some nice things and even instructing your child well, but Sister Sally does not speak as an ordained minister, Sister Sally cannot speak on behalf of the Church, Sister Sally cannot do for your children what you can do, because while Sister Sally may have a general love for your child, only you (dad and mom) know the needs, understand the hearts, and see the week after week struggles of your child to properly train your child.

Remember, worship is not the academy, it’s not a classroom, it’s a living experience of the Triune God in a sacred space taking place by the power of the Spirit in the heavenly places (Eph. 2:6). Read that sentence three more times.

Yes, your child will struggle to stay quiet and he/she will be distracting; and yes, it will demand a little more of you each Sunday. And, you may miss that really great hymn/song while you are changing a diaper or Johnny throws a fit over something. But I can guarantee you that the more you do it the more you will begin to see little victories and with each little victory you will discover that the joys of corporate worship are always more filling when you are together with your little ones during the worship of heaven. Like any glorious thing, the benefits come when you persevere in this holy task.

On August 4, 2020 By Uri Brito In Discipleship Like

On the Fruit of Long Conversations

One of the blessings I’ve had over the years is to speak freely about a host of issues that few pastors wish to discuss on social media, unless, of course, they take upon themselves anonymous identities. I am part of a denomination that rarely if ever makes the map when it comes to national discourse. Our pastors are not well known; with few exceptions, they don’t make headlines, and when we do, it’s to engage in intramural discussions that 0.001% of evangelicals care to ponder.

I actually find this lack of exposure fairly comforting. It means that I, as a pastor of a small congregation, have the luxury of opining about a host of topics I find to be biblically important, culturally necessary, and pastorally expedient without distractions. This allows me to minister to a small group of people (maybe less than 1,000 views a day) that are interested in growth and find argument built in lengthy paragraphs compelling.

In some ways, my goal of writing has always been to slowly, but surely, convince my readers that building frameworks for life are important and thinking through current issues or rituals through a Christian perspective is crucial for the well-being of any society. I am still a believer in long-form conversation and dialogue about the good, true and beautiful, and I view it as an investment in the kingdom of God.

I had a lengthy interview/conversation with a really fine thinker yesterday that reminded me of the necessity of building men and women who love Jesus and are curious enough to create environments where healthy engagement takes place in the home and in the community; where discourse is not settled by throwing out slogans, but where the heart of the slogan is discussed and perhaps torn down. While we see some movement in the right direction, we need much more. I am reminded of one of Jordan Peterson’s rules which I translate as “Don’t raise children with whom you won’t converse.” In other words, don’t raise children that will bore you when they get older. You diminish that possibility if everything is on the table for discussion at the dinner table.

The biggest frustration of this entire season is that prior to it there was already a deficit in these conversations, and through it, many discovered that they don’t need it any more, thus isolating themselves with greater vigor and enthusiasm. The natural isolating process diminished even more the capacity for discussing complex topics. Movements are throwing out their acronyms and demanding loyalty simply because they espouse some pro-victim cause. The idea behind it is that the conversation is over; embrace or die.

In Jane Austen’s “Persuasion,” there is a lovely little section where she writes,

“My idea of good company…is the company of clever, well-informed people, who have a great deal of conversation; that is what I call good company.”

Whether dialogues on parenting, sleeping techniques for infants, the ethic of ants, the making of good wine, or Russian dancing techniques of the 18th century, all these things stem from a God who enters steadily into conversation with his people. So, whether 50 or 500 likes, or a 1,000 lurkers, or 1 fruitful exchange happens as a result of anything you or I write or say, we are already beneficiaries of the entire process. Keep the feast! Keep the company! Keep the conversation alive!

On August 2, 2020 By Bill Smith In Discipleship, Theology, Wisdom Like

Hell?

Hell is like that bit of family history that the whole family knows about but tries to avoid in polite conversation. The only family member who talks about it is the crazy uncle who has no couth. Some family members do their best to deny that piece of the family story altogether. We can focus on the pleasant things and not deal with that nasty bit.

But it just will not do. That part of the family story turns up time and again. It simply cannot be buried.

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On July 5, 2020 By Bill Smith In Counseling/Piety, Discipleship, Family and Children Like

Count The Cost

We are rapidly approaching the intense campaign season. (It seems that we never leave campaign season anymore. We only have less and more intense seasons of it.) Big elections will be happening soon. Debates will occur and stump speeches will be given. Each candidate will be telling you why he or she should be elected (or at least why the other guy should not be).

Most of these candidates will be telling you all that they are going to do for you. One side is going to give you all this free stuff. The other side is going to reduce your taxes. Everyone is concerned about sweetening the pot to entice you to sign on with his agenda.

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