The way of wisdom in Proverbs is the way of discipline. Solomon’s concern for discipline is heard from his opening words. We don’t pick up on it too readily because translations render the Hebrew word musar as “instruction” in some places and “discipline” in others. “Instruction” is not a bad translation, but we tend to reduce instruction to the verbal communication of truths from one brain to another. The Hebrew word, however, more literally speaks of a “chastening lesson,” which, I believe, is better rendered as “discipline” (though even that translation has connotations in English that may be misunderstood). Solomon desires that his son know wisdom and discipline (1.2), to receive the discipline of wisdom (1.3), to hear the discipline of his father (1.8). Fools despise wisdom and discipline (1.7).
The discipline of wisdom is the training of mind and body to produce a specific character that will cause you to fulfill your God-given purpose and enjoy God’s promised rewards. There are numerous sources for discipline, people and situations that are aimed at shaping our character. A primary source for discipline in Proverbs is parents. Parents are exhorted by Solomon not to neglect the discipline of children (19.18; 23.13-14). This training involves positive examples of discipline in the lives of the parents themselves, making the truth of God beautiful in their own lives. Parents must train also with positive, purposeful habits that give direction to their children as well as instructing them through teaching. Because the hearts of our children are bound up with foolishness (22.15), discipline also involves correction.
One parental tool that is prominent in Proverbs for this corrective training is the rod. It is not an exclusive tool. The rod and reproof–verbal rebuke and instruction–give wisdom (29.15). However, the rod is a tool, an obviously necessary tool, in the training of children.
Images come into our head when we read or hear “the rod.” Maybe the switch that you had to cut from the tree for your daddy to spank you comes to mind. You might think of a wooden spoon, paddle, belt, or some other instrument of pain that was applied to your seat of learning. If you’ve ever been spanked well, it is understandable that the instrument and its effects are all that come to mind.
Those images are not absent from the biblical use of “the rod,” but they are incomplete. The rod is the instrument of a shepherd and, therefore, a king (see Ps 23.4). In fact, it can be translated “scepter” (see Pss 2.9; 45.6; 89.32). While it can be used to destroy (see Ps 2.9), that is all a part of a larger purpose: to put the world in proper order.
Parents are rod-bearers, shepherd-kings of our children. We are shepherd-kings with God-given authority and a God-given instrument to be wielded to set put our children’s worlds in order; to train them so that they relate properly to God, others, and the non-human creation. The rod is not used arbitrarily or for selfish purposes. It is not an instrument of frustration that divides you from your children. The rod is used to set relationships right, which means that it must be applied in such a way in parent-child relationships that reconciliation and peace are the aims. Your child is not your enemy and should not be treated as such. You are not out to destroy him with the rod. Yes, the rod is an instrument of pain, and corrective discipline, just like all discipline, is painful (see Heb 12.4-11). But the pain is aimed at positively shaping your child’s character so that he avoids what is destructive and embraces what is life-giving.
Avoiding physical pain in corrective discipline is popular in some circles. If any pain is involved at all, these parents believe that psychological pain is sufficient. Scolding, isolation, removal of privileges, and things as such are seen as adequate applications of the “rod principle.” While these methods can be useful at times, we shouldn’t discount what the Bible says about physical pain in correction. Our children are not disembodied psyches. Training the mind through the body and the body through the mind are both needed. Enduring physical pain helps train the mind as much as enduring psychological pain trains the body. The two are interrelated. Neither should be neglected.
The aim of all our discipline is to shape the character of our children so that they embrace the way of wisdom with all their hearts. Parents, God has given you the authority and tools to do this. Wield them wisely.
